Relationships; a reason, a season or a lifetime?
Often when we think of relationships, we think in terms of romantic relationships and our relationship status. However we all have many more relationships in our lives.
Parent/child, siblings, friends, colleagues, neighbours, clients, customers, even our pets. Some of us even talk to our plants! Today my google mini device thanked me for how I speak to her. That was a surprise, I can tell you. It could have just been because of the song title I asked for, but hey ho, she was happy.
How we treat other people, is often a reflection on how we treat ourselves. What we expect from others is often driven by our own values and ideals. The language we use, positive versus negative, and our tone is all so important.
Of course one of our most important relationships is with ourselves. When we fail to look after ourselves, its so difficult to maintain great relationships with other people.
Good relationships really do have magic ingredients. Our mutual values really play a big part. Respect, connection, understanding, love, empathy to name but a few.
On the other hand, relationships that aren’t working are missing these vital components and often have toxic ingredients instead like control, physical and emotional abuse, anger, violence, imposed guilt, lack of attention and complete overstepping of boundaries.
Most relationships fall somewhere in the middle, a mixture of the good and sometimes the bad, just don’t let it get ugly!
All relationships need attention in order to grow and blossom. Quality time spent together is definitely a move in the right direction. I was lucky enough to spend some time away this Easter with Ian, my hubby, in Whitstable on the Kent coast. It was so nice to actually have time together strolling along or just staring out to sea. It was a golden opportunity to reconnect and just be together, just the two of us without chores or agendas.
They say relationships are for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. Someone will come into your life for all sorts of reasons and certainly a chance to learn from each other, whether its for a fleeting moment or many years. So even if a relationship ends, someone dies, or moves away, it will have definitely served its purpose and ideally brought you both a lot of joy or at the very least a life lesson or two!
Our longest relationship of course is with ourselves. How we treat ourselves and care about ourselves is fundamentally the most important of all relationships. We owe it to ourselves to be patient, kind and above all forgiving. We need to honour our values and stand up for ourselves. Caring for ourselves, and ultimately each other is definitly a great way to be.
How can you make sure that your relationships have plenty of the magic ingredients?
Who do you want to reconnect with?
Who do you need to learn from?
Who do you need to distance yourself from?
And finally, how can you create a great relationship with yourself?
So thank you for being part of my life while you read my words and hopefully we will connect again very soon.
Lots of love
Jane xxx